Advice for Estranged Parents

I’ve been dealing with something like this!! I lost custody of my kids for 6 years, I done the work, I jumped through the hoops, I regained custody. I guess the damage was already done, and forgiveness wasn’t in the cards. My oldest daughter ended up moving in with her dad’s sister. (Which was always trying to steal my kids away) it worked. My mother tells me I need to be the bigger person and make amends with my daughter. Here’s the thing, she left me this last time, I was a good mother to her did everything for her, she’s the one with the issues, so why do I have to be the one to make amends when I didn’t cause the gap this time. She tells her dad she hates me, but when I’ve asked her I get I’m sorry I’m a bad daughter. I never get anything other than Mom I miss you, mom I want to go back being a kid and living with you. Which leaves me wondering wtf?? If that’s how she really feels, then why the no phone calls or visits, the girl literally goes next door for holidays and doesn’t bother to come see me. She drives right on past me to go spend time with the women that done everything in her power to destroy our relationship. And I’m supposed to be bigger the person? I’m really struggling with this? I feel like I’m still being punished for something that she’s swore she’s forgiven me for..

Some adults CAN'T and WON'T be reasoned with. People don't just cut off their parents for no reason. 🙄